The funeral went off without a hitch.

Although I was not fully aware of what was going on around me I understand that there were in excess of 70 people there which I was delight with. To know that you were loved by so many people makes my heart sing and lifts me in these my darkest days.

The ceremony was as you had wanted Good people to celebrate your life and no religion! I cried throughout as I am now whilst writing this.

The flower tributes were beautiful and your wildlife friends had a feast over night. I know you are happy about that.

The reception was very well attended and I also appreciated this with everybody mixing and sharing stories.

This would have delighted you, it is the sort of gathering where you could have felt at home, knowing everybody and being comfortable around them.

My dearest Jacqueline you are the most wonderful human I have ever had the privilege to know but to have been loved by you made my life complete. You were my morning noon and night and now you are everlasting in my memory. The grief I feel cannot be explained or put into words. I have lost my reason for being and you can never be replaced. 

I know energy cannot be created or destroyed it merely changes state and this gives me solace knowing you are all around even though I cannot hold you in your physical form.

All the difficulties and hardships you endured through your life have all faded away now and your pain has passed but mine has only just begun. I hope I helped you bare that pain and you know I would have happily taken all of it.

I have never contemplated having to live without you and these are not words I ever thought I would be saying on our 33rd wedding anniversary.

You know our families are surrounding me with love and support and I will go on to reflect your integrity and values upon them as they grow older and I will be a supportive reminder to them of you.